Untitled
Yo Superman, You good?
Whats up?
Superman, you good? I need a quick miracle . Meet me at the corner?
Nah sorry man I just sold my last bag.
Please bro. I just need like, .8, no, .6 of a miracle. Please superman. Same price.
I could if I would. Hit up Jesus. I hear hes got that divine intervention shit.
Jesus? Jesus has been out of the game for 2000 years.
Yea, but if he walked on water in sandals, imagine what that mother fucker could do in nike airs.
Aight aight ill call him ill call him.
Yo Jesus. You good?
No man Im out of town.
I know your lying, Im like right down the block just let me stop by.
Man, You can roll by the tomb if you want but I wont be in there. I thought I told yall not to even check. I haven’t even had a miracle in years, you must have gotten your names all crossed up. don’t worry it happened to me to. Maybe I could point you in the right direction, where you living at?
Jesus, I am currently residing in the united states of America
Hahaha. You lookin for miracles in the united states of America? Theres been a drought since 1980.. I think I sold a bag to some hockey players… That shits illegal now. You gotta head up north man. Other countries regulate their own miracles, you can only get them at certain hours but still good shit
Governments giving out miracles? I heard about that.
Yea man. Good shit too. grams of hospitalized eyes opening,
emergency landings
and potential lovers dropping books.
Ounces of well placed fire extinguishers,
Doctors in the house
and bullet eating necklaces,
You want some positive pregnancy tests?
You want some negative pregnancy tests?
Were talking Bags of pebbles that bounce balls back onto the sidewalk,
Resurgent parachutes
and hearing voices in the rubble.
That’s exactly what I need. Come on, I need help. Please man.
Look, I’d love to help, but I’m dry. Magic Johnson alone copped half my shit. Some guy came and cleaned me out too, I don’t remember his name… said he’s gonna need four years worth. I don’t think you understand how hard these things are to come by..
Like, did you know my dad’s depressed?
Gods depressed?
Yea man, It really only took him two days to make the world, but he spent the 2nd five laying around in bed. He said he’s really sorry about hurricanes, he just needed something to stir with when he made the oceans. You’ve got to realize even God is operating without miracles.. Like.. I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone this but Global warming is just from when he tried to save the titanic.. were just trying to make ends meet up here
I understand times are tough.. but if you were in my situation, Jesus, what would you do?
Why do you mother fuckers always ask me that? I don’t have an answer for ya kid.
Fine.. Last time I look to god for help.. I know who Ill call
Yo.. This is Harry Houdini right?
Speaking
Think I could get some miracles real quick?
Miracles? Miracles are for chumps. I can sell ya magic and it’ll cost half as much. I’ve got flattering slight of hand, pin drop subtleties and mirrors telling lies. I’ve got accomplaces in the audience, chains made of styrophome and hidden trap doors. I’ve got
STOP! I don’’t want any of that.. That stuff killed you! I want the hammer that breaks the water tank, the Uncle Alfred safety net. I want the super hero that catches the girl right before the ground, the secret serviceman’s day to shine.
I’ve got 53 card decks, fangless tigers and assistants holding keys, I’ve
No! I don’t need any of your tricks, I’m gonna be just fine with what I have.
See, I shake my Geney lamp like you shake your coors,
just looking for a little more. Now you remember what I have, this little dime bag of hope and dreams that you all say is not packed enough, you remember it, because it is gonna have you all, so, fucking, high
3 years ago • Notes